D’oh Christmas Tree - December 15, 2017

No matter how you cut it, a Christmas tree indoors is less eco-friendly than one outside. And then there’s the dispute of real or fake, so here are some paradoxical choices to make:

A tree indoors, as with many a tradition,
like the joy of a family’s new addition,
is fraught with potential perils unknown.
So, choose wisely the tree that will be your own.

Choose a tree that’s not PVC plastic,
not too rigid and not too elastic,
but must also never shed needles,
sap, parasites, ticks, nor beetles.

It could come with lights if you feel lazy,
or do it yourself and risk going crazy.

Choose a tree not too small and not too imposing.
Consider transportation, and storage, or disposing.

Remember, too, when you get a tree,
you might need one accessory:
a sturdy stand that will not tip,
with a water pot that will not drip.

Now, for a genuine Christmas tree aura,
there must be the scent of evergreen flora.
But you cannot fool a real tree fan,
it must be from nature, not from a can.

When all done and content to admire
your shiny glowing electrified spire,
will your chosen tree never catch fire?